| THE EPISTOLARIAN |

Recently, I finally did something that had been on my personal bucket list for years. I sat down with Vicki Iskandar, a Chinese astrologer whose work I have admired for a long time. I am endlessly interested in astrology, especially when it comes from different cultural lineages. Each system asks different questions, and I often find that the questions matter more than the answers.

During our session, Vicki shared many things that I am still turning over in my mind. But one comment made me laugh out loud. In her tradition, people with my constitution are said to be so solid that ghosts leave them alone, which may explain the small, slightly embarrassing pang of envy I feel every December when I return to A Christmas Carol. Scrooge receives what I consider one of the greatest gifts imaginable: a single night in which his life is revealed by three ghosts: past, present, and future. Decades of perspective compressed into one evening.

Clearly, Ebenezer and I have different constitutions.

But the difference that matters most is not the one people usually name. Scrooge is often reduced to a caricature of greed, his story flattened into a simple moral lesson. Be more generous. Pay your employees better. Care about others.

Dickens is doing something more subtle though.

Scrooge does not live comfortably while others suffer. He lives by the same strict principles he imposes on the world, applying them inward with equal severity. He denies himself warmth, rest, pleasure, and community just as rigorously as he denies them to anyone else. This is not discipline in service of a higher calling. It is deprivation mistaken for virtue.

One of the clearest moments comes in the office scene with Bob Cratchit. Scrooge keeps the fire low, rationing coal so strictly that both men sit shivering at their desks. The cold is not imposed from a place of comfort. Scrooge endures it alongside his clerk. The punishment is not unevenly distributed. He does not believe he deserves warmth any more than anyone else does.

There is a Scandinavian word that captures what Scrooge has refused himself: koselig (pronounced "koosh-lee"). It is often translated loosely as cozy, but it is deeper than that. It encompasses warmth, ease, safety, and belonging. It is the feeling of being held, physically, emotionally, and in community.

As we arrive at the solstice, the darkest day of the year, I find myself craving koselig, something I’m far better at creating for others than allowing for myself.

For me, this shows up as an overcommitment to routine, stressing over being "healthy," exercise, and sleep, as though comfort might get out of hand if I didn’t keep watch. Scrooge understands that coal should not be wasted, and he is not wrong about restraint. What he fails to grasp is that winter is precisely when you burn more, and that winter passes.

Feast days and gatherings are brief by design. Our lives follow the same rhythm. Koselig is meant to be entered fully while it is here, and without apology.

Scrooge’s transformation, and perhaps ours as well, is not simply about giving more. It is about finally allowing ourselves to live well. To accept comfort without guilt. To recognize that nothing needs to be earned through suffering.

So I offer this as permission.

Where might you let yourself soften by a single degree?

Perhaps if we learn to allow this kind of koselig for ourselves, even those who never receive a ghostly visitation will not be in need of one.

“ A merrier Christmas, Bob, my good fellow, than I have given you for many a year! I’ll raise your salary, and endeavour to assist your struggling family, and we will discuss your affairs this very afternoon, over a Christmas bowl of smoking bishop, Bob! Make up the fires, and buy another coal-shuttle before you dot another i, Bob Cratchit!” — Scrooge,"with an earnestness that could not be mistaken."

The Kitty Book Pawn

Just a handful remain.

The Kitty Book Pawn is a small Étui piece about beginnings, commitment, and moving forward one square at a time. In chess, the pawn advances without retreat, and through endurance, it’s the only piece that can become something greater. Progress earned slowly, not inherited.

This pawn carries its own penny, marked with two simple symbols: a house cat and a book. Together, they speak to rest and curiosity, independence and learning, and the long work of becoming something meaningful from modest beginnings.

Cat
Inscribed Solis sui domina, “sovereign of herself.” The cat stands for independence, discernment, and chosen stillness. A reminder to rest without apology and act only when it’s truly yours to act.

Book
Inscribed Cogito cresco, “I think, I grow.” The open book represents learning as something living and ongoing, shaped by return, reflection, and time.

The Simone Penny

This Friday, the newest penny debuted, and I’ve heard from so many collectors that it’s already their favorite to date. It holds so much of what I love about the Hastings Étui: beauty, magic, lineage, and community.

This penny is named after my friend and fellow collector, Simone, who stewards the largest collection of antique wax seal étuis in the world. For years, she has patiently assembled and researched these pieces so their stories, and the artisans who created them, are not lost to history.

Simone has the eye of an artist and designer, and the mind of an archivist. She notices the smallest nuances between pieces and remembers an astonishing amount. She documents lineages and paper trails with a precision that would impress the world’s best detectives. In fact, she has even uncovered crimes in the antique wax seal world, possibly a story for another day.

When I was designing the Étui, Simone was a sounding board and a loyal friend. She believed in the vision early on and helped me understand the lineage we were stepping into with the Hastings Étui. Through her research, I also learned that this month marks the two-hundredth anniversary of the very first étui, developed by Brasseux Aîné in Paris.

To surprise Simone and thank her, I designed the Simone Penny using two of her favorite motifs. One side features a unicorn, a symbol of purity, innocence, magic, and rarity. The other depicts the sun, moon, and stars, a motif about how deep love can conjure the whole universe on behalf of those we care for.

This penny will not be remade. If it’s been calling to you, now is the time.

These are two original antiques from Simone's collection, which inspired her love of these motifs. You may notice that the new penny isn't a replica; it's continuing a conversation from history.

“ For me, collecting antique wax seals isn’t about ownership, it’s about stewardship. I see myself as a custodian of history, safeguarding fragments of the past. Each seal holds the artistry, culture, and silent voices of another era. By preserving them, I’m not just honoring tradition, I’m extending its life, hoping it will echo beyond my own. — Simone, A Tale Unfold

2nd Edition Pre-Order

Only 23 of the first 50 pre-orders are still available for the 2nd Edition Hastings Étui, the "Helix" edition, which has a lovely helix engraved in the handle. You can watch the Instagram Live Session I led all about this special edition and the pennies it includes here.

This edition quite literally rings like a bell once the pennies are added. It’s sturdy, beautiful, and fully compatible with all pennies already made, including those from the First Edition Étui.

Penny One
Three bound keys and an oak tree.
The keys stand for thresholds, stewardship, and inward authority, a reminder that what is meant for you already has a place prepared. The oak speaks to endurance and continuity. Growth that deepens without abandoning its roots.

Penny Two, The Claire Penny
A bee and lily of the valley.
The bee honors steady creation and the transformation of effort into sustenance. Lily of the valley marks renewal and the return of happiness, delicate yet resilient, blooming again after winter.

Penny Three
Words and a messenger.
One side bears the phrase verba mea fiunt, “my words become,” a seal of intention and authorship. The other shows a greyhound carrying a sealed letter, a symbol of fidelity, trust, and the careful delivery of what matters.

Each penny was designed to be lived with, not just collected, marking thresholds, seasons, and the long arc of becoming.

The Festivities Continue

I’ll be fulfilling orders that come in through today, December 21, before heading into a holiday break. You’re still very welcome to place an order after December 21, it just means shipments will resume around January 7.

If you need a shipping delay because you’ll be traveling, you can leave a note with your order. I’ll be sure to send Kevin McCallister to keep an eye on your house while you’re away. 

One More Festive Penny

The November penny feels especially fitting for the coming weeks, carrying peace, joy, and love into the holidays, and perhaps a little champagne as well. 

Heads: Ad Vitas Effusas
A champagne bottle bursts open, cork flying, a small celebration captured in brass. It is a reminder not to live bottled up. Pour yourself freely. Rise. Shimmer. Let your joy spill over. Ad vitas effusas means “toward poured out lives,” a call to stop shrinking and to welcome more beauty, more delight, and more magic into your days.

Tails: J’Apporte La Paix
A peace dove arrives with an olive branch, offering calm in the middle of celebration. It reminds you to return to yourself, to breathe, to soften. J’Apporte La Paix means “I bring peace.” The dove has carried this message for centuries. Light returns. Hope arrives. Peace is possible.

Finally, I will leave you with this. When I first took the Enneagram, I did what anyone would do and immediately looked up which famous people shared my type. Everyone else seemed to get formidable historical figures. I got Tiny Tim.

So perhaps this is, in fact, the proper way to end this Epistolarian.

God bless us, every one.