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Toujours Droit

Toujours Droit

A 💵 and Piece of Bubblegum 🍬💗🤗

My passion for writing was kindled by my grandmother, Neenie. From a young age, I learned from her how to infuse letters into my life. Most nights, she sent me a card with a dollar bill and a piece of bubblegum, always replying with a new note for every letter I wrote her. She extended the same gift to my sister, ensuring we each had our own special correspondence.

Many cards concluded with a postscript of "ILUABAAPAAHATN," an acronym for the Doris Day song, "I love you, a bushel and a peck, and a hug around the neck."


Neenie was a woman of extraordinary vitality. During her college years, she modeled for Mademoiselle magazine, radiating with an elegance she carried through he life. After World War II, she transitioned to the role of a housewife, raising three kids. She became a fervent advocate for civil rights starting in the early 1960s.

Her life took a remarkable turn when she and my grandfather moved to San Francisco, serendipitously arriving during the Summer of Love. She embraced a new career as a psychotherapist, delving into Jungian ideas and avant-garde practices like scream therapy (which, by the way, is quite liberating if you try it in your car! 10/10)

Neenie’s legacy, along with the influence of other women in my family, deeply shaped my views on beauty, art, history, and relationships. After my grandfather’s sudden passing, Neenie began what my sister and I refer to as her "pink era," transforming her San Francisco apartment into a haven of ivory and blushy pinks.

Neenie’s approach to aging resembled a spirited return to youth. At 64, she took up swimming and running, consistently embracing new adventures. She swam a mile each morning in the chilly waters of the San Francisco Bay and even started running marathons. When I was six, she taught me how to do a headstand, defying convention by demoing a headstand herself.

She also introduced my sister, Betsy, and me to the finer things in life—experiences like tea at the Ritz San Francisco, champagne in crystal flutes at her apartment, and stays at five-star hotels, luxuries beyond our parents’ means and/or parenting style.

One of our most cherished plans was a trip to Paris with Betsy, where we dreamed of staying at the Ritz Paris and immersing ourselves in the city's elegance. Although we never made that trip, I still hold on to the hope that someday we will, possibly with our own kids or our grandchildren.


When I was 12, we faced the devastating loss of Neenie to colon cancer. Her sudden passing, just three months after her diagnosis, was a profound shock to our family, especially since she had appeared so vibrant and healthy.

Neenie’s influence lives on in my love for letter writing and my pursuit of a creative life. My dreams are simple yet deep: to live a life filled with creativity, beauty, and harmony with those around me; to help others find their unique voice and inner peace, especially through letter writing; to teach the art of wax seals and letters; and to create heirloom pieces—whether seals or novels—that can be cherished for generations.

This past week, I found myself wrestling with self-doubt over my slow but steady progress toward my big dreams. Although my efforts may not be evident through visible achievements or a strong social media presence, I am moving forward each week. I'm designing disks for the new Kathryn Hastings etui, working diligently on my epistolary romance novel, and filming the Kathryn Hastings masterclass, The Art of Wax Seals, which comes out in July. In these moments of uncertainty, I sense Neenie’s presence, her pride, and her excitement for the future. She reminds me that whether one is six or sixty-four, it’s never too early or too late to turn toward your dreams.

Toujours Droit


The wax seal of a metronome, paired with the inscription “toujours droit” (always straight/right), offers a wealth of interpretations. To me, it symbolizes the idea that everything unfolds at the right time, much like a metronome's precise tick.

While I don’t fully subscribe to the belief that everything happens for a reason or at the perfect moment, I do think that adopting this mindset makes life easier to bear and dreams more approachable. Especially when it comes to big dreams, I find comfort in believing that the pace and timing are just right. Each beat, though seemingly insignificant, is essential for the harmony of the dream's full composition.

Don’t we all need a reminder that we are on the right track and that everything is unfolding as it should, in its own time?

 

Feature Wax Color: Mademoiselle

 

Neenie would have loved this color, especially during her pink era. It is inspired by her, and all things romanitc Paris: the Ritz, Chanel, tea time, and grandmothers and grandaughters together.

It's a pearlescent pink that is soft and bright and oh so romantic. I love pairing it with romantic mov

I've renamed Promenade pink to "Mademoiselle."

Neenie would have adored this color, especially during her "pink era." It’s inspired by her and all things quintessentially romantic: the Parisian elegance of the Ritz, the timeless allure of Chanel, cozy tea times, and the cherished bond between grandmothers and granddaughters.

This pearlescent pink is both soft and luminous, exuding an air of romance and charm. I love pairing it with motifs that evoke a sense of whimsy and affection—delicate flowers, hearts, cherubs, and all things lovely.

I named it “Mademoiselle” as a tribute to Paris and a nod to Neenie’s time modeling for Mademoiselle magazine. Although the magazine is no longer in circulation, its tagline, “the magazine for smart young women,” still resonates beautifully today.


For the Next Generation

Each week, I’m filming new segments for The Art of Wax Seals course, showcasing my most advanced techniques: wax marbling, wax weaving, UV paints, and even frosted seals. I’ve designed these methods to be so accessible that even a five-year-old can follow along (with a bit of supervision). In fact, many of these techniques I’ve already taught to my son, William.

Thoughts on the Pod: Dürer

I broke down Dürer's correspondence from his trip to Venice, through which he painted a master piece, and also grappled with the opinions of other artists and the xenophobia he encountered.

After listening to the episode, my friend, Angela, texted me:

When I started Kathryn Hastings and Company, I had no idea how challenging it would be to deal with everyone's opinion on the internet.

Even though my work with wax seals is relatively non-controversial, I still encounter internet outrage from time to time. I try to remind myself that it’s a matter of reach. The reason Albrecht Dürer faced criticism was because he put himself out there, engaging with different communities and values. The 21st century amplifies this, making our work accessible to a much larger audience than ever before, but also exposes us to many more critics.

I wonder how Albrecht Dürer would have navigated our era. In today’s world, he would likely face far more criticism online than from the handful of Venetian artists who may have opposed him in his time. The concept of ‘poison’ is intriguing here—just as Dürer had the choice of whether to dine with those who might literally poison him, we, as 21st-century artists, have the choice of whether to ingest the figurative poison of online critics.

I’ve spent a great deal of time trying to be perfect for the internet, only to realize it’s an unattainable goal. People hold you to standards they don’t follow themselves. The vast amount of feedback we receive today highlights the impossibility of pleasing everyone, a realization that is both daunting and freeing.

In some ways, I’m glad for Dürer’s sake that he didn’t live in our time, but I also feel a tinge of sadness for him. The constant barrage of opinions forces me to be more discerning, to accept only the feedback that resonates with me, and actively disregard the petty injustice I feel from those who don't like me. Understanding that I can’t satisfy everyone has finally allowed me to ask the most important question: What do I want?

Do share your thoughts each week. I love hearing what insights you glean, and also things I may have missed. 🙈

 

With love,

 

Kay



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